2001-04-27.7:38 p.m.
the entry i am going to hell for...
the entry i am going to hell for...
My girlfriend is a little weird sometimes � such as when she buys copies of Maxim.
Just to do Maxim justice, here are some of the headlines� with no embellishments.
* SEX * SPORTS * BEER * GADGETS * CLOTHES * FITNESS *
Sex on the edge � boldly go where no man has gone before.
Sammy the bull gets a Suntan � a curious tale of skinheads and Ecstasy in the Arizona desert.
Fast Cash for Dopey Ideas! � get rich now.
�Pass the Harpoon!� � Catch it, kill it, eat it � Maxim tackles fishing.
Glory, Glory ALI-LUJAH! � American Outlaw�s Ali Larter shows us a glimpse of heaven.
[I should point out that Ali is dressed in two pieces of clothing: Upper half - in a men�s white tank top shirt, cut strait up the front and held together with a safety pin � being seemingly blown open by the �wind� dieing to just let her breasts explode out. Lower half: in a pair of men�s jockey briefs � thumbs around the waste band - seemingly seductively about to pull them down.]
In a quick browse I�ve counted only 101 pictures of women in fuck me poses, 1 picture of a pig, and 1 add for sex gel. By the way, a fuck me pose involves many things, such as clevage, staring eyes, butt shots, and or complete nudity with only arms and legs covering body areas that would end up getting Maxim mailed in plastic wrap.
What�s my point to all of this?
The point is a question. If you were a friend of mine and came over to my house and saw in the bathroom a copy of Maxim, would you even pause to believe me when I told you that my girlfriend buys it?
No, no you wouldn�t. You would immediately believe I buy the magazine to use the magazine to �abuse� myself alone in the bathroom.
I am right, aren�t I?
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Ok, now to be sure that this is the page that horney men always find through google, I am going to write out a long list of horney men phrases. Phrases that I will get lots of shit for. Phrases that will damn me to hell. How do I know what horney men phrases are? I�m a man and I�ve been horney. That�s how.
Fuck me. Fuck me now. Fuck her. Fuck them both. Fuck from behind. Fuck in the front. Fuck from the front and then behind. Fucking on top. Fucking on the bottom Fucking on the bottom but you want to be on top. Woman being gratified by a man. Man being gratified by a woman. Doggie style Dick sucking. Cock sucking. Dick licking. Cock licking. Oral sex. Blow job. BJ. Deep throbbing deep in the throat deep throat. Throbbing. Throbbing hard penis. Erect penis. Cock ring. Pierced nipples. Prince Albert. I have a pierced left nipple (I do) Finger. Fisting. Fornication. Longing glance of lust? Cum. Cum shot. Cum squirting all over her. Cum squirting all over him. Cum shooting in the air. A fountain of cum. Cum Gum. Teenage girls get fucked in the head and then cum. shove a finger up that ass little man in a boat labia clitoris breasts tits tit nipples vagina mangina shaven clean hairy twat snatch hair pie man tree dick cock pole schlong pee pee love stick rock and roll poll thing men like to beat in the shower women showering. Men showing. Men and women showing together. Women showering with women. Men showing with women showering with women a wet dog and an albatross and a clown named pinky. Dominatrix s&m m&m psjlk&ms and m sado-masochism whips chains and fun pamela anderson sara spranker maryln monroe marquis de sade henry miller erica jong hal sirowitz sushi steak surf and turf oysters clams on the half shell oh no that�s dinner now I�m gonna steal from the back cover of cristin okeef aptowitcz�s book mentioned above: teenage girls get fucked in the head - hot anal relax teens anal deep fucking which hole to choose? Ah the anus, anal sex and how to ride dogg style, hot latinas anal fucking with cum shot, deep anal penetration, strait up that ass, big cock up the ass, rectum rip, whores that love anal fucking, cum in the hood, it looks great time for backdoor sex oh yeahhh anal sex movies where the chick screams anal sex means getting fucked like a dawg anal sex soft wet ass sliding up and down teen scared of hug dick in anus oh well hot latinas nal fucking with facial cum shot anal action with hot brunette up the ass but no shit on the dick in her ass out her mouth anal penetration a fist and dick go in simultaneously doggie style for pussy and anal guy bumm fucks a really hairy pussy first some blowjobs then some ass fuckin i'm done stealing now missionary position. always pay attention to the labia the labia is your friend give your woman oral sex and enjoy it now or else trust me boring sex sucks there is no such thing as a rape fantasy women do not have rape fantasies trust me fuck me tease me treat me like a bad boy let me have my way with you touch you touch me hold me first hold me lets cuddle I�m tired please get off me are you done yet oh yeah oh baby yes yes yes good phew good night.
Now to keep track of how many hit�s I get from search engines for this page alone.
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HEY! I�m going out tonight. Yay, a crappy dive bar to listen to a good poet late at night. Sounds fun because they have beer at places like this.
