The headlines are real, the take and the story is mine...
Vets get their due
�President Bush clears way for World War II memorial
This building of this memorial has been held up in legal battles because of it�s size � the plans for it are so big - reaching 4 stories high, and located where it is expected to obscure the view of other national memorials at the Washington Mall � such as the Washington Monument. Critics say it will detrimentally change the environment of the most recognizable area of Washinton. I am sensing a pattern with Bush here.
Budget busters
� WashPost: Tax cut, spending imperil plan
If you put in the things that were left out of this budget � like the defense buildup the president will call for, the education spending every senator says they�re for - the entire budget put forth by the White House and the Republican�s falls apart. Why are we concerned about money when we have 5.6 trillion in surplus cash � you know the cash, the cash Bush pushed his tax cut plan through on. Well, that money doesn�t materialize for 3 to 5 years. I�d bet education is going to suffer and I�d bet this has a lot to do with Jeffords bolting from Bush land.
Fatal Florida fire
� Blaze kills 1 as a hot, dry summer season begins
Send some of that hot dry weather my way. I�m dying here- dying of mold spores and lack of sunlight. I�ve petitioned Governor Lincoln Almond to rename Providence Soggydence. Achoo!
U.S. may buy Russian missiles
� Report: New strategy to change ABM
The Bush administration is preparing to offer Russia a package that includes buying Russian-made missiles to gain cooperation for the elimination of the 1972 Antiballistic Missile Treaty, administration officials reportedly said. The missiles could then be used as part of a U.S.-crafted missile defense for Europe. Yes, Bush is going to try to kill the treaty that helped bring an end to the cold war with Russia and start a new one with China. You know, apart from the stupid scandals such as cigar gate and white water rafting gate with Clinton, he was never in the news this much for his policies. You know why? Because the entire news community wasn�t terrified of what Clinton was doing.
Energy crisis shadows Bush trip
� WashPost: Risks on the West Coast
This has pissed Bush off, so he is now removing all spending from every domestic plan � such as the program to assist crippled children with bus programs so that he can build his own personal giant sun in the sky so that nothing he ever does is over shadowed again. He does plan to turn off his own personal solar star for his upcoming linguist compitition. STRATEGERY!
U.S. picks up pace in Mideast talks
� Envoy plans more meetings Monday
I can think of nothing humorous or insightful about this same news story that I�ve been reading for 1,800 years.
The life of a teenage �mule�
� Newsweek: Inside the drug trade
Only 5% of all vehicle traffic can be checked by border patrols for drugs. So basically there is no way to stop the flow of drugs over our borders. Perhaps we should stop spending so much money on the war on drugs and spend it elsewhere � such as in treatment programs and OH MY GOSH � preventative programs such as education as to why you shouldn�t shoot up with heroin and throw pounds of cocaine up your nose. Nah. That�s stupid, the war on drugs and getting tough on crime makes it seem like politicians are �doing something.� Clearly education and domestic plans take too long to ever get a politician re-elected.
Lakers pave way to sure-fire win
� Ventre: No chance for Bucks, 76ers
No chance I�ll be watching any of this.
� A grand plan to remake the military
Why Pentagon Toilet Seats cost 400 dollars a piece
� �Pearl Harbor�: no box office record
I watch the history channel a lot, it�s a fault. So since I�ve seen the pearl harbor invasion oh� 47 times, I don�t want to sit through 3 hours of a love story that I also know how will turn out � tragically, I�d bet.
� Tom Brokaw: Home of the brave
johnpowers: Land of the free. Marlon Brando: Where the buffalo roam. Will Smith: Wild wild west. Cat Stephens: It�s a wide world.
� Staying safe in the sun, pool
Sun screen and hats unless you live in Providence � the land of the eternal Charlie Brown Cloud.
� Nutrition Notes: Healthy barbecuing
What�s the point? It�s a barbecue. Hell, even eat the bones man!
� World War II�s forgotten soldiers
Attu. The Island of Attu. The second bloodiest battle fought during WWII � besides Iwo Jima � and it was fought on American Soil � in the Alaskan Island chain.
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Happy Memorial Day.
