�� new old this that ��

2001-06-01.8:00 a.m.

� Jaded and Angsty Horoscopes �

The horoscopes are two paragraphs down.

So I can�t sleep. I�m not sure why, other than not being able to breath. Did you ever notice that people don�t like when their preconceived notions are challenged?

Anyway, tonight I�m in a head to head poetry battle with Tony Brown. How very exciting. Hopefully I can take a nap first� and yes, I know I look like hell in the picture (it's a long story.)



Aries 3/20-4/18
Look at the larger picture. Try volunteering or even giving a dollar to a homeless person. Some things will do more good than others. Pack a lunch and eat it outside.

Taurus 4/19-5/19
Improvise. Get out, take a half day off from work or school and go to some place you haven�t been in a while. Eat something exotic, like alfalfa.

Gemini 5/20-6/20
Mess with someone, challenging the way people perceive things tends to make them angry, so beware, Do it anyway. Dinner and can opener should not be in the same hour this weekend.

Cancer 6/21-7/21
Tie someone up. Try role reversal. Pretend to not be yourself and have fun with it. Comfort food � go with the comfort food.

Leo 7/22-8/22
Set up a buffer between you and the bull. You have more important things to do than be distracted by morons. Red meat �eat red meat because you�re probably low on iron.

Virgo 8/23-9/21
Things will turn out all right for you. Relax about it, you�ve done all that you can do. Make only 1 trip to Dunkin Doughnuts.

Libra 9/21-10/22
Feeling confident today? Good. Wear dark clothes this weekend and spring your enthusiasm on some one like a tiger. Be the tiger. GRRR. Raaarw. Umm, cereal.

Scorpio 10/21-11/21
If you keep your spirits up you will be rewarded by finding a dollar on the street� or not. Either way, you will be just as better off. Salad with feta cheese � even if that salad is sold to you with mostly lettuce � mostly lettuce to rip you off.

Sagittarius 11/22-12/20
Feeling over whelmed? It�s time to talk about it. Communicate the root of the problem before it stands a chance of getting better. Eat the bag lunch or eat at home. The only one getting to you is yourself.

Capricorn 12/21-1/20
PARTY. You need to go out and party. I�d say Chex Party Mix, but that makes a bad dinner. Go out to dinner, spend less than 15 dollars on an entr�e, and then go out and, you guessed it, Party.

Aquarius 1/21-2/19
It�s time to cuddle� with a good book, with a sweetie, with a cat or dog. You get the idea. Nurture yourself and the ones around you. Oatmeal, eat that oatmeal for breakfast.

Pisces 2/20-3/19
Patience and talking. Patience and really listening. Stay away from the doctor and all news will be good. I sense a lot of pasta on the horizon.



Oh, I almost forgot. Tomorrow morning I have to be in Warwick at 8am because I'm volunteering at the Secial Olympics. 8am until 3:30pm I'll be there helping kids in my company's softball toss. I've never done this event, but I imagine every kid who tries will get an award - no matter how far they throw the damn softball.

Let me tell you, I'm going to be pissed if I have to tell some child with a disability "sorry, but you didn't throw as far as Mark, so you get nothing� wheel along now�"

I'm also a little worried about saying the wrong thing or acting strange, even though I've never had a problem acting any different around people with disabilities before.

As far back as I can remember I've always treated everyone the same. I thank my mother's influence for that.

Anyway, I have a new project at work, I'm high as a kite on Day-Quil� and Suda-Speeeeed�, and I made Jen cry this morning because I was tired and grumpy and snapped at her.

I am the worlds worst sick man�

We made up and all is well. I apologized soon after - as soon as I realized what I had done, so save the nasty messages. "Ok?"

"Ok."

Gotta run.



�� new old this that ��
            














Since Feb 2001





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