I have a half day today!! *john dances in his chair until he cracks his knee on his cubicle furniture* Ow! At least now I have a reason I can't dance at the concert. Tall lanky man genes? Pscha! I hurt my knee, that's why I'm sitting here.
So every Wednesday I run this advice column and since it's summer I only have 2 people asking for advice. Well fine, just wait until the fall when all the poo poo starts to hit the fan. I'll remind you all of this day. Oh yes I will.
If you need advice or need the answer to something only a weirdo like me would know, click on this � advice link.
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name: Amanda
email: [email protected]
url: http://milquetoast.diaryland.com
question:
So what should we call them: midgets, dwarfs, munchkins, or "little people"?
answer:
If you don't want to offend anyone, refer to them as Persons of Short Stature
By the way, There are two types of abnormally short persons: disproportionate short stature, and proportionate short stature. The proportionately short stature persons are commonly referred to as midgets, and the disproportionately as dwarfs. There are three types of dwarfs: (a) pituitary, (b) cretin, and (c) achondroplastic or chondrodystrophic.
Pituitary Dwarf
Pituitary dwarfism results from the failure of the pituitary to function normally. Pituitary dwarfs usually look like smaller copies of normal sized people. They usually have normal mental abilities. Dwarfs with normal body proportions are often called midgets. The most famous midget was a dwarf named Charles S. Stratton, or often called "General Tom Thumb."
Cretinism
Cretinism occurs when a child's thyroid gland does not produce enough hormone for normal growth. If untreated, cretins become misshapen and mentally deficient. If the lack of thyroid is discovered very early in the life of the infant, then the condition can be corrected without side effects. If not, damage is sure to occur.
Achrondroplastic or Chondrodystrophic Dwarf
Achrondroplastic or Chrondrodystrophic dwarfism may result from some abnormality of the endocrine glands. This is the dwarf described in Norse Mythology. Achrondroplastia can be inherited. Human dwarfs have been in the media since the Norse mythology pictured them as ugly, powerful creatures called nibelugs. During the Dark Ages, dwarfism was considered a sign of mortal sin and many dwarfs were tortured and put to death. During the middle ages many dwarfs were kept as court jesters.
Gary Coleman who has a rare kidney disease that has stunted his growth is neither a midget nor a dwarf and is purported to even have a job again.
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name: katie
email:
url: http://slyparadox.diaryland.com
question:
i can't remember if i asked you this or not...but why do some guys think that most good looking girls will cheat on them? i mean, that's so unfair. it's like it's my fault and i'm genetically inclined to be unfaithful...just because some girl ruined it for the rest of us. blech.
answer:
I always thought the reason was that all pretty girls were spawn from Satan's loins and the All Knowing Father of Creation's way of giving retribution and payback to all us ugly ass Christians was by making all you heathen pretty girls burn in the sulfur pits of hell for all eternity as well as by making you pretty girls cheat on your boy friends.
*john slaps himself
Ahem. It's just that the boy who's worried is insecure and doesn't believe he is attractive enough, smart enough, witty enough, Favio-eske enough for a pretty girl to be satisfied enough with him and not cheat on him.
Another way boys think is that if *they* want sex all the time and if *they* will screw anything that won't cause them to chafe (and even will screw some of those 'things' too) then a pretty girl would certainly take many many chances to get busy behind his back because since she's pretty she could have any man she wants... blah blah blah
Boy's are stupid, nuf said.
