� answers �
Today I become the Answer Guy a day early. If you need advice or need the answer to something only a weirdo like me would know, click on this � advice link and I will do my best to express the knowledge.
----------------------------
name: kissmekate17
email: [email protected]
url: http://www.geocities.com/kissmekate17
question:
how can you get through to a guy who seems to pride himself on his 'open minded' , 'enlightened' opinions, and yet revels in his continual bashing of the one group he particularly dislikes? (yea, that's a run-on but it was a long thought). see, i really enjoy reading his writing, but i'm perpetually disappointed by his blanket statements regarding individuals of a certain political bent (of which you may assume i am one). i have no *big* problem with his opinions... i don't always agree, but i can live with that. (free country and all) it's just the jarring incongruity of his intelligent statements against his bigoted ones that are aggravating. is there any way to show this man the light, johnpowers?
answer:
Sometimes you have to pick a side. Take me for an example. I'm actually more towards the center in some ideals and views. I don't want a socialist system in this country, but the way I bash Conservative Republicans would make some believe I'm a closet commie.
Why do I do it?
Because I believe I can win. If I point out the hypocrisy of Republicans while I ignore that of the other parties, the things that are important to me - such as women's rights, the environment, government programs for the arts, the poor, etc... stand a better chance of staying around.
Your question is a little general, so could this person have an unspoken agenda as well? Could this person just be an intelligent racist?
People are rarely changed by the will of another. They can only grow and evolve, but you may want to kick start that evolution by talking to them about your concerns.
----------------------------
name: Larva
email: larvamachine.diaryland.com
url: http://larvamachine.diaryland.com
question:
Sometimes when I talk to my friend on ICQ and he's been silent a little too long and I'm just about to ask if he's there he says something. And sometimes when I'm just about to head off for the night he comes on and wants to talk. Why is that??
answer:
Uhhh... He probably is thinking the same things you are. Such as "Gee, she's been quiet for a while, let me chime in." As for the late night logons, does he know your schedule? Is he popping in at that time because he knows you will be home?
I somehow doubt there is a psychic thing going on, but that�s not saying you two don't have a connection.
----------------------------
name: molly
email: [email protected]
url: http://molzo.diaryland.com
question:
What do you do when your friend of tne years suddenly decides she's in love with her boyfriend of five years (note that I have five years on him), and she no longer has time for you? Then, she turns everything around ot make it seem as if she's hurt more, and now I'm apologizing. And all that apologizing isn't working, and she's no longer speaking to me. What do I do?
answer:
Tell her if she values your friendship at all, she should understand that you would be upset at the thought of never being able to see her.
If it were me, I'd write that person off as a selfish manipulative user of people, but you're not me, so I'd try telling her that you realize she's mad, that you do understand how much her boyfriend means to her, that you weren't trying to get between them, and when she is ready, you will be willing and available to talk about it and hang out.
Chances are if you tell her this, she'll call you as soon as they get into another huge fight.
Until then, play it cool and let her come to you. Forcing it any more is not a good idea.
----------------------------
name: Britton
email: [email protected]
question:
At what point does a girl become your girlfriend? I may have a situation on my hands.
answer:
If you mean, at what point does one become committed to another - as in a committed mutually exclusive relationship, then it all depends on what the two individuals have decided.
Talk to the person about it. See what their expectations are/were, and take it from there.
For example, some people wouldn't have sex with a person unless they were committed to each other, others have no such hang-ups about sex and are comfortable with a polly-amorous relationship. If the two people never talked about it, one of them could be in for some serious hitting of the fan with the proverbial poo poo.
----------------------------
name: rachel
email: [email protected]
url: http://protoplast.diaryland.com
question:
why were the horrorscopes so skimpy this week? usually i find them to be both entertaining and useful, but this week i was very disappointed. are you having an off day? ;-)
answer:
The month of July was hell for me. I had no free time - even to keep this journal up to par. I still managed to update, but I never spent more than a few minutes on it. That Friday with the skimpy horoscopes was a crazy day and I just didn't have the mental energy to try to be entertaining.
Things should be back to normal soon.
