� answers �
I'm almost back to normal - mentally. Heh, as if that's possible... so I guess I am saying I'm almost back to my old pre July self. Damn this summer kicked my ass.
Anyway, Wednesday I become The Answer Guy! If you need advice or need the answer to something, click on this � advice link and ask anything you would like to know.
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name: Lori
email: [email protected]
url: http://chaoschick.diaryland.com
question:
Why do some men feel the need to stare at breasts? If it's because they're fascinated by what they don't have, why don't I feel the urge to stare at men's crotches? Also, why do some people think girls with big breasts are dumb? Let's just say I'm one of these things and not the other. This is driving me crazy and any thoughts would be helpful.
answer:
I once saw a documentary that dealt with in part the similarity between the female butt crack and the female breasts.
A full plump naked butt crack signified a healthy mate and thus was attractive to a male as once upon a time all that mattered to humans was reproduction and the continuation of the human species - as opposed to today where men and women have to worry about vacation condos in Aspen and how fly their girlfriend will look as they dance together at the rave...
So on one level its an instinct from when we were all hominids wandering the plains of the Savannah.
On other levels, men do stare at breasts because they don't have them.
Men do fantasize about what breasts look like without the barrier of that bra, swimsuit or bikini top.
Men do equate large firm breasts with a woman being good in bed.
Men may have a Freudian attraction to large breasts because as an infant their mothers breasts were huge compared to them in their baby forms and subconsciously many man want to be babies again suckling the teat of their mommy. Of course Freud was wrong on a great many things, so what do I know.
Men are trained through the media and this society that larger breasts are better and they should be attracted to them. Find a Hustler or a Playboy magazine and take a look. The body images you will see in there are the body images many men have been taught they should admire. Watch a re-run of Bay Watch, watch Son of the Beach, watch Sex in the City... look at those women that are force fed to youths as their sexual preferences are being formed and you'll have the answer to why men stare at large breasts.
A lot of men are rude as well, because for every man that stares at a large pair of breasts, there are an equal number of men staring at a smaller pair, but for as many men that are staring at any pair of breasts at all, there are also an equal or greater number of men trying their hardest to not appear as if they are looking anywhere but in the woman�s eyes (or their own shoes) - because they don't want to be perceived as rude and are try desperately to not appear as if they are disrespecting their female counterparts.
Many men are pigs, others aren't...
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name: mindlesslug
url: http://mindlesslug.diaryland.com
question:
do you find it wise to fall in love with a guy who isn�t gay, only to be disappointed later on?
answer:
It depends on when you found out the person was gay. You're probably setting yourself up for a heartbreak by falling for someone who probably won't love you back the same way, but if you were under a false impression, then there really is nothing you can fault yourself for.
A person who is gay has a right to have feelings for whomever they want. There is nothing unwise in heartbreak. Just be careful to gauge this person well, some homophobic people can react rather violently to a challenge to their 'manhood'. Whatever the hell manhood means anyway...
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name: Kaylee
url: http://queenmab776.diaryland.com
question:
Dear John Powers: I am trying to keep in touch with a guy I met this summer via e-mail and the occasional phone call and letter. Do you have any suggested topics to keep our conversations fresh? Do you have any suggestions about non-serious long distance relationships? Thanks!
answer:
This person must have interests. If you have the same interests you are in luck, because you can talk about those.
If you do not have interests in common, then ask yourself what you do have in common. If those things are not that serious, then talk about those.
If the only thing you have in common is the attraction, then you are in for some trouble and you will either have to quickly find some common ground or the relationship is doomed to stagnate - especially because it is a long distance relationship.
A non serious long distance relationship requires the two parties to maintain a bond or a reason to continue said relationship - unless the reason for the relationship is just so the two parties can hang out and or hook up when they are able to someday be in the same location.
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name: jen
email: [email protected]
url: http://sjomedia.diaryland.com
question:
Why do people tailgate you in the right lane on a 3-lane superhighway?
answer:
Because people can be stupid. They can be impatient. They can disregard the safety of others and themselves because they are stupid and impatient.
People in this country have a sense of entitlement. Entitlement to what they want when they want it - be it pay per view, the movie they want at blockbuster (they better not all be out), as much electricity and gasoline they can use, hamburgers in 2.5 minutes at the drive through, whatever food you can think of at the grocery store and it always will be in stock... we are fast becoming an instant gratification society.
Is it any wonder a person thinks that they shouldn't have to pass you if they want to go faster than you? They probably think if they get close enough, you will speed up and they won't have to go through the effort of turning the wheel.
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name: kate
question:
I'm not asking for advice but seeking someone older and wiser to disspell a few urban myths. Is it true that Whoppers and Big Macs only have pickle in them to prevent their sugar content having them classified as confectionary? Is MSN really going to charge for messenger after september? Can people really track email forwards to know whether you did or not and to whom? Is George dubya Bush as brainless as he seems? thanks John.
answer:
1) Pickles have no affect on the sugar content of fast food burgers. If anything, the pickle contains some fructose and only adds to it.
2) I have not heard a thing about there being a charge for MSN Messenger after September. If they did, MSN would be dropped by the online community as quick as a severed head in a grocery bag left on your doorstep.
3) Email can only be tracked backwards. You can determine through the header of the email every server and sender it passed through to get to you. A person can't tell with normal text email if you passed it on unless that email somehow gets back to the person who wants to know.
If you allow html in your email, then that opens up a lot of loop holes into the above statement. You can include a single pixel .jpg image in an email and suddenly the server that stores that single pixel image can tell where that email ended up next - and whether or not you sent it along at all.
There's more to it as well, but you get the idea.
4) George dubya Bush... Nope, he's not as dumb as many think. His opinions and policies, and especially the special interests that influence him just go against what many people believe in.
He's not a great public speaker and doesn't seem to do well under pressure - especially when he has to ad lib and speak without a script, so that is where the perception comes from.
The debate is whether or not he is smart enough and single minded enough to be a good president... and once again that comes back to what you believe is best for the country.
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name: Amy
email: [email protected]
url: http://daisy11181.diaryland.com
question:
This is an exerpt from my roommate's diary. She is referring to me when she says Amy...we were just wondering if you could give us a good answer...thanks! Men!! They are so dumb. I mean God bless em and I love them, but geeeeeeeeeez grow a brain!!! Amy and I are convinced that God didn't give them a brain on purpose. It would mess up the Y-chromosome too much. Example #1:Chris not understanding that the following is not a compromise. Chris: "I will be there in an hour." Amy: "Why don't you come now and we'll take a nap together." Chris: "Fine. I'll be there in an hour." Hmmm. Example #2:David saying he's coming tonight to come and get his car, but he hasn't even heard if the car's ready yet. And didn't ask us if the dealership had called about it, which they haven't. So taking a 2 hour trip up here from Jacksonville would be a waste of his time. Riiiiiiiiight. Example #3:Lee insisting to Amy that he doesn't like me but he's called me the past three days in a row to see if it was OK that he stop by since he was going to be in Greenville. I'm like, he's in Greenville all the time, why is he just now wanting to stop by? And why so often? Is it just for the beer? Weeeeeeeeee don't think so!! Uh huh, yeah. Example #4:My professor not deciding he wants to cancel class until we all show up at 8am only to find a note. Thanks! Example #5:I almost forgot this one. It makes no sense at all. Lee again. This time Amy and I were discussing this Boston chick he had dated. He told me yesterday that she had been his girlfriend and that they had been "in love". I was like oh you never told me that. Too bad while he was seeing her he was seeing me and hooking up with me. So then he complains that she cheated on him when he went up there and I was like helllllooooo!!! I was sucking your dick the whole time, so you cheated on her too!! And Amy said at the time she was talking with him and he was saying that he still loved Becca, didn't know what was going to happen with Boston girl but they'd see when he went to visit her and was still hooking up with me so he didn't know what to do. So we were like BUSTED!!!! Why the hell can't guys be smart enough to at least make up one story and stick with it like girls. I mean how the fuck are they going to cover their own asses otherwise?? *sigh* Those are only a few examples of the common calamity of male stupidity. If you are in fact a male and can enlighten me why you are so dumb, please let me know.
answer:
Example #3:Lee insisting to Amy that he doesn't like me but he's called me the past three days in a row to see if it was OK that he stop by since he was going to be in Greenville. I'm like, he's in Greenville all the time, why is he just now wanting to stop by? And why so often? Is it just for the beer? Weeeeeeeeee don't think so!!
Duh, he likes you and doesn't want to scare you off by admitting he does. Insecurity does not imply stupidity.
Example #4: ...My professor not deciding he wants to cancel class until we all show up at 8am only to find a note...
Being selfish and inconsiderate is not a sign of a lack of intelligence. Perhaps something came up like an illness or a flat tire. Someone inconveniencing you does not automatically make them dumb.
Example #5: [boy cheating on his GF with you, then you getting mad at him for saying he was in love with her while he was cheating on her with you because if he cheated on her with you and he loved her, then what is to stop him from cheating on you even if he does love you...]
Some of the most intelligent people on the planet have no conscience and even less of a sense of moral decency. Are all men stupid? Perhaps according to you, but to Hitler all Jews were evil and look where that went.
Oh as for Example 1 and 2: Did you realize you submitted this question 3 times before you realized how the submit form worked? Using your logic, I'd have to call all women stupid. Even though its obviously not true.
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name: clover
email: [email protected]
url: http://findyourself.diaryland.com
question:
What/how is the best way to go about getting published? I know you're a performance poet, but I thought you might know. There are so many scams out there preying on young naive hopeful poets, and I'd like to know what my best chance is of getting legitimately published, for either poetry or fiction. Gratzi.
answer:
Get yourself a copy of The Writers Market. Any submission request that asks you to pay any amount of money greater than a few dollars should be taken as suspect. If you�re really serious about getting published then expect to be sending out a lot of letters.
