This Friday at 7pm,
I am going to sit outside with a candle.
I will light a candle to show anyone who sees it that they were not alone in the shock they felt as the second plane hit.
I will touch a match to a candle and I will cry. I will cry with the millions of others around this world who believe in the freedom of religion, of free speech, of the rights of women and men to live as they please and not according to the ideals of those in power. I will cry for innocence lost.
I will light a candle then watch its flame burn. Watch its smoke rise and I will think of the panic felt by four thousand seven hundred humans as they realized it was too late. I will feel the panic of a million family members first hearing the news. I will feel the panic of a country shutting down. I will feel the panic.
I will light a candle to acknowledge the guilt of being alive while so many are not.
I will light a candle to recognize our anger. As the raging hostility builds in so many, I will let this candle burn symbolic - so that not another innocent life is wasted for a misguided cause. Falling wax will replace senseless violence. If I need to hurt, my own fingers can burn.
I will light a candle because there is little else I can do.
I will light a candle for healing and watch it like a wound grow smaller... like grief reconciled, the candle will not be unrecognizable and so like it our grief will not be forgotten... but someday less painful - as hard as that is to believe.
I will light a candle for Hope. Hope for the future, hope for our loved ones, hope for those not yet found - even as people begin to go back to their lives. I will light a candle for a new beginning - one where our rights as humans are sacred and no one can imagine killing for their god. I will light a candle for hope that terrorism will never again be tollerated - and the world will stand united and full of resolve.
I will light a candle for this hope, for our sorrow, for fear subsiding, remorse all encompassing, rage under control, helplessness abating and for healing every day...
This Friday at 7pm, I am going to sit outside and I am going to light a candle.
