Friday is horoscope day - yes, my take on horoscopes for the weekend.
Aries 3/20-4/18 What you are waiting for is on it's way. Patience - even if it's undeserving. Try to eat on the healthier side this weekend.
Taurus 4/19-5/19 What's with the hair? Changing your look is never a bad thing, but perhaps you should re-consider. Is all the meat a really good idea?
Gemini 5/20-6/20 You have nothing to fear but Spam™ Itself! Seriously, everything will be fine, and seriously, stay away from the Spam™.
Cancer 6/21-7/21 Smoke is bad for you - get away from it. Chances are it's going to be a good weekend, so take advantage of it.
Leo 7/22-8/22 Enjoy your trip, make the most of it, it'll be fun. Buy new sunscreen and eat some greens.
Virgo 8/23-9/21 Stop working so much, instead try pimping out your significant other for extra cash. Oh, wait. That won't work out so well. Find the time for a quick nap.
Libra 9/21-10/22 Feeling overwhelmed today? Why? Stop being silly about it and just bite it back. Beware of street grills.
Scorpio 10/21-11/21 Open a new savings account. I sense it is time to get some new salad dressing.
Sagittarius 11/22-12/20 You have so much to feel proud of. You also have a lot of work ahead of you. Increase your sushi intake. Dramatically.
Capricorn 12/21-1/20 A lot of people think you've dropped off the face of the earth. What's the deal? Prove them wrong with a surprise. Jell-O.
Aquarius 1/21-2/19 Stop doing everything in spurts. Just as sprinting before warming up, sitting for days without stretching your body - your mind - your routine will induce cramping and irritability. Bananas! Buy the Bananas!
Pisces 2/20-3/19 Find the Sagittarius-Rex's in your life and make them go out to Sushi... Think of it as community service. Order a little tempura too.