When entering the elevator it is bad form to hold the door open so that your friends who are down the hall can meander over - oh no, don't quicken your pace - meander over to ride down with you.
Real Bad form.
While running to catch the elevator it is NOT bad form to jam your hand or your foot into the almost closed elevator door crack so it open so you can get on. However it is bad form to physically wrench the doors open with both hands as that is scary and I don't care if you're rehearsing for the Broadway production of U-572. It's just bad form - it's scary and you look stupid with all those bulging neck veins.
While standing in the elevator, it is bad form to face the other elevator passengers - especially if you have a nice ass. You are denying the other elevator riders of perfectly good ass gazing time. Plus, it's creepy.
While riding in the elevator do not look anywhere but at your cell phone, PDA, shoes, or more preferably at the numbers above the door counting up or down to your floor of destiny. Anything else is just weird and bad form unless you are looking at someone's nice ass.
It is bad form to get caught looking at someone's nice ass in an elevator.
It is really bad form to get caught looking at someone's really ugly and not nice at all ass in an elevator.
It is bad form to scream like a little girly if the elevator makes a strange noise or bumpy motion - especially if you are a Big Burly Man. Big Burly Man, elevators have cantilever devices on their rails that slam closed and act as breaks if the elevator moves too fast. Big Burley Man, you should watch The Learning Channel or History of Modern Elevators on the History Channel, you will know these things and be able to stifle your scream the way I do. Oh yes Big Burley Man, you want to be like me.
Bodily emissions should never be brought up in an elevator, even if it is a discussion about elevators. Yes, farting - even silently and mildly violent farting is bad form when it comes to anything to do with elevators.
While riding in the elevator you should not move ever closer to the old woman who is known to be claustrophobic until it is just you, the CEO and her jammed into a single brass and dark wood corner of the executive elevator. Brown nosing and tormenting people with phobias in elevators is no longer culturally acceptable inside said elevators. No matter how fun it is. No matter how much the CEO likes it. It's just wrong: You're BAD! BAD BAD FORM!
Bad form.
Good dog.
Do not pet the seeing eye dog while in the elevator. The seeing eye dog is working while he is in that elevator and if you distract him enough, he may lead his owner out into a 50 foot void when the elevator doors open up into nothing again. Making a game of this is VERY bad form.
Do not sit in an elevator while there are people in there with you - Bad form.
Do not make really strange Jim Carrey contortion faces in the reflective surface of the elevator doors while you are alone in there. The doors will open unexpectedly and your boss will be standing there waiting to get on. Scaring the boss before he gets in an elevator is bad form.
If you are a construction person, you must at all costs use the passenger elevator and bring with you a pallet of sheet rock so that the 'Suits' walk out looking like they just visited a chalk factory. This is highly recommended and is only considered bad form by the 'Suits.'
Before getting off the elevator, do not press a couple extra buttons just to mess with people. I will write about you if you do, and you don't want that.
johnpowers writing about you is bad form.
Do not talk on your cell phone in the elevator, as everyone know that they do not get reception in there - even the new pretty woman from the 8th floor. You look stupid talking to no one.
And finally do not ever do this.
