�� new old this that ��

06.10.03.2:58 pm

Fire Captain Powers!

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

George Carlin (1937 - )

If you work in a high rise building, chances are you know about floor fire captains. We're just the lucky individuals who sit in the strategically placed cubes and offices that have an average number of other workers around us.

We're the corner cubers. The aisle cubites. The people who have to make sure everyone else is off the floor and running down the stairs trampling their fellow man as the building catches fire - before we ourselves leave.

So that's been me for the 4 years I've worked in this cube. Fire Captain John Powers. Only now I'm getting new duties. I now have to be First Responder Fire Captain John Powers because tomorrow I'm being trained on a portable defribulator machine and getting all of my one and two man CPR certificates renewed.

How. Exciting.

I'm serious. Who knows the next time I might have someone go into cardiac arrest next to me? Who knows the next time there might be a portable defribrilator stuck to a nearby wall?

You never know. Seriously. Didn't you read above that I was serious?

I used to be a life guard for a few years in college and I had to be trained for this stuff back then, so it's not like I'm charting unknown waters here.

Did you get my Nautical reference? Life guard... Uncharted waters...

Did I mention I have Yoga tonight?

Did I mention I'm taking a course on summer wines on Wednesday?

Did I mention my writing is no longer funny?

Did I mention I'm going to the theatre on Saturday? Recently I've seen 5 artists at the Carriage House. The Long Christmas Ride Home at Trinity, and now we're going to see I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change down at The Theatre by The Sea.

I think there should be a theatre on the sea. On a boat on the sea. And they should only put on productions of desert movie adaptations like ISHTAR!

That way when fat angry old men get so mad at being on a boat seeing a theatre production of a bad movie and have a massive heart attack I could use my newly re-learned skills of CPR and defribulation!

They might be so grateful for saving the man's life they'll give me the boat!

Or I could just get over the Fire Captain thing.

�� new old this that ��