Yeah yeah, so I smoked a few cigarettes. It's not like anyone can sue me, and even if the Anti-Smoking Brute Squad could find me, how much could they punish me for being bad (oh yes - yes, punish me like the bad boy that I am! Make me feel naughty! OoooOoOh!)
Ahem.
As I was saying, I smoked a few cigarettes yesterday, but everything I've read about quitting smoking says that if you lapse a little, don't sweat it. Just go back on the patch the next day.
The problem was that I didn't wear a patch all weekend. I thought I could somehow teach myself to enjoy the cravings - that inner tense feeling that can only be likened to a dull constant sensation of having your nipple pierced by a spoon.
Yeah, I thought I could channel that. But I was wrong and here I am back at work, drinking gallons of coffee (which is also a bad idea when you're quitting) and wearing a patch.
I'm just going to have to quit the normal way.
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I blame my girlfriend Jen. She tried quitting cold turkey this time, and caved in before I did. So of course I stole a few of her cigarettes and smoked them... and of course this lead to my buying a pack yesterday.
Yes, I blame her and not my willpower. Which is o.k. because the last time we relapsed, I was the one who gave in to the nicotine genie first and caused her to relapse.
Understated and understood mutual blame. Tit for tat. Fine, you screw me up now, I'll screw you up later. We'll get each other in the end. - It's all why our relationship works.
Pleasant revenge is all so much better than holding a grudge.
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This past three day weekend I only left my house to go down to Thayer Street. That's it.
I read. I watched too much cable. I posted a few entries.
Generally it was a waste and I'm not proud.
The Silent One stopped by Monday morning to say hello during her travels getting her independent comic book published, and tried to get me to leave the house, but I wasn't having it.
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Jen works retail right now while she's office job hunting, and has noted that almost everyone who goes to the mall is in a hellish nasty mood.
Her theory, based on our mood as well as the mall patrons is that the entire North East has seasonal affected disorder.
Could it be?
Is all of the northeast SAD?
Because I am. I am SAD because I can't continue to smoke
and not die.
p.s. Shito needs some lovin.
