Yay it�s Wednesday and tonight I have yet another Slam Team practice to conduct, and as always, Wednesday is the day I answer the questions from the � advice section of this site.
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name: Britton
email: [email protected]
question:
What is the real world like? I've barely seen any of it, and I'm to lazy to go outside.
answer:
The real world is full of rapists, murderers, marketing execs, and Republicans. It is indeed a scary place - but usually only to stupid people - people who don't use common sense.
Walking down a dark alley in the red light district wearing a string bikini is a bad idea. Walking down that alley and then into a pool hall where one decides to take a drunken nap on a pool table while 15 Hell's Angels wannabe's get their game interrupted by ones drunk string bikini clad almost bear ass is an even worse idea... just destined for trouble.
So if your not a stupid person, feel free to go outside and see all the world has to offer - like the mall.
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name: jen
url: http://sjomedia.diaryland.com
question:
how do they make kitty litter?
answer:
They crumple up cats into little balls and then discard them in the street where they end up clogging gutters...
I mean... for standard littler they take clay and roll it into sheets where it is run through a gnawing teeth like device that bites little pieces off.
I have no idea about that fresh step or insta scoop stuff - I think that stuff was the result of hideous war time experiments and should be boycotted because of the time I once tried to flush some of it down your toilet and clogged it for weeks. Remember that? Ya.
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name: Piper
email: [email protected]
url: http://white-rook.diaryland.com
question:
Why does Canada allow women to go out shirtless in public, and the US doesn't? Aren't we the land of the free? It makes me want to pack up my belongings and head across the border... but then again, Detroit isn't much different than Windsor. More shootings and better currency exchange. Hmm.
answer:
We may be 'The Land of the Free', but we are also the land founded by the Puritans.
You DO remember the Puritans? Right? Thanksgiving? Mayflower? The Scarlet Letter? Hester Prinn? The priest who had an affair with her and then whipped himself secretly for years as penitence?
Those Puritans.
They're not only responsible for you having to read books by Nathaniel Hawthorne, they�re also the people responsible for things like blue laws - laws regulating public and private conduct. Laws that prevent people from buying beer and hookers on Sunday. Laws that used to keep stores closed on Easter. Laws that prevented the advertisement of cigarettes on Sunday and the playing of shuffleboard in public.
Canada was settled by the French as well as the English - who are in my generalized opinion much more inclined than the people descended from Puritans to public nakedness and thus public fornication and even public naked shuffleboard fornication.
That's my opinion of the differences between Canada and the US and feel free to leave your opinions in my guestbook if you're from Canada.
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name: G.I. Ho
url: http://garyhoare.diaryland.com
question:
How might one remove squatters from a building?
answer:
Two ways. The courts, or you call Dave, myself, and my cousin and we 'evict' them. Call me if you need me to help with some 'persuasion.'
Start thinking of alibis.
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name: Amanda
email: [email protected]
url: http://milquetoast.diaryland.com
question:
Im in one of those low-self-esteem moods, so you'll have to excuse me. But! Is it normal to lose interest in everything you love -- all at the same time? What the?!
answer:
Actually everyone gets depressed from time to time. Seasons change and moods often go along with them. If after a few weeks you still have no interest in anything and are having feelings of self doubt and blas�, it might be time to talk to a professional.
If you're not depressed, then perhaps the things you used to love just sucked and it took you a long time to realize it.
