An expression is worth a thousand pictures
as long as they're not of your face.
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I have tomorrow off from work, and I'll be finishing my Christmas shopping.
PLEASE KILL ME BEFORE I HAVE TO GO TO THE MALL.
Ahem.
I only have to buy gifts for three people, so it's not bad, but these three people are the hardest people to buy for.
My mother - She want's nothing. No clues, no ideas, she wants nothing but I have to get her something. I could buy her underpants. That would be memorable. "Here mom. I bought you underpants because for so many Christmases you bought me tighty whiteys and I thought I'd return the favor. Oh, and I put your name on all of them with a black sharpie."
My mother's life partner Andy - "Here, I bought you golfing supplies for the 5th year in a row. Enjoy my creativeness."
Jen my girlfriend - She want's something. What that something is, I have no idea. She won't tell me. I am supposed to guess and still come up with the perfect gift. I am her boyfriend and I honestly SHOULD know this... but hey I'm a self absorbed egotistical moronic asshole deckhand... I have no clue and I'm about to set sail. There are something's she wants - that she will get - but these don't cost money, it's the money gifts I have no clue about. "Here are your gifts sweetie. I hope you don't mind that I've hidden all of the sharp objects in the house."
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I lost money on last night's show. Not much, and it rarely happens, but still. I need to start doing some better marketing for the Third Wednesday of the month Poetry Slams at AS220.
Bill was the feature. He rocked as usual.
A guy named Matt won the Youth Slam and a woman named Christina won the Adult slam. All in all it was a good show.
I was supposed to go to my office Christmas party that night, but since I left work early feeling ILL, I couldn't just show up saying "I can party but can't work... yeah."
So I showed up at the Slam and helped out and let Ray and Jared run most of the show because they were supposed to fill in for me anyway - and I still couldn't move my jaw very well...
So after the show I gave my friend Ray a ride home. I dropped him off, and then drove myself homeward.
I felt like hell
and I was so tired I missed my exit off the highway, but this is Providence and there are 15 ways to get home from any place
hell I can spit across this state, it's no big deal
but right after my exit I saw police lights and wound up stuck in traffic for a half hour because some moron in a truck creamed a little Honda caving the back in coke can like and everyone
I mean everyone
had to rubber neck viewing the carnage as they passed.
Why do people feel the need to stare at accidents?
Do they get a perverse pleasure in the pain of others?
I've heard some people like to watch NASCAR just for the eventual crashes. Is this the same thing?
Are people's lives that boring where they need to see if people they don't know - people they will never know - are hurt?
Are they looking for bodies?
I don't know.
